Your Perception is Your Reality
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"It's not what happens to you but how you react to it that matters".1 This is one of the profound realities of living in today's world. Our actions and reactions define who we are and our choices determine our path.
Yogi Berra summed it up with this statement, "You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you are going because you might not get there."
Consider your drive to work each day. Some drivers view their commute as a series of conflicts, the war on vehicles. If these other drivers would just get out of my way I could finally make some time. Our perception changes once we become the grandma or the slow moving vehicle. I don't have to imagine that driver. It's me, the grandma in the slow moving vehicle. Imagine that I'm your grandmother.
I once heard someone say, "If all you can think about is the bumper of the car ahead of you that's probably where you'll end up." Over the years my daily commute increased from forty minutes to ninety minutes due to heavier traffic. I was spending over ten hours a week being annoyed at other drivers. What a waste of my waking hours!
How could this stress be eliminated? Tomorrow the same people will be driving like zombies, talking on their cell phone or texting, not paying attention when the light turns green, changing lanes in front of you for no reason, and arriving at their jobs angry and wired up. But not you. You can choose to see things from a different perspective.
Start by turning off the radio and listening to an uplifting music CD, you know the kind, one that makes you sing along and feel happy. For birthdays, ask for a gift of audio CDs from motivational speakers and start plugging these in during your commute.
Look for ways to increase your overall happiness through your own creative choices. By putting the commute in the background it allows time to focus on more productive things.
"Your mind is the most powerful tool in the universe."2
Many people hold on to the draining power of non-belief rather than opening their minds to the possibilities. From the minds of the most successful come simple observations:
"We become what we think about."3
If we begin to see ourselves as happy and productive then we'll start to become happier and more productive. In a powerful video called, "Discovering Your Human Potential" Dr. Bernie Siegel says it like this:
"If you wish to be more lovable, you must become more lovable."4
What does that mean? How does a person become more lovable? By becoming more loving. Have you ever smiled at someone who was frowning? What happens? They usually return your smile.
People respond in kind to how they're treated. The way I see things now is different than it once was. My perception has changed. Though I still struggle with moments of unjustified anger and frustration, I'm a happier person than I used to be. It is a choice.
When I experience someone who's having a bad day and taking it out on me, it helps to view others as myself, in my "not-so-nice phase". And I wonder, "What could be troubling this person today?" When you lie down at night and review the events of the day do you have regrets or are you pleased with the way you handled yourself?
Each morning when we wake up we're faced with an important decision: Will we choose to be happy or will we choose not to be happy with whatever life gives us that day. It is a conscious choice whether we get "from the day" or just "get through the day".5
What will be your choice today?
This material was written by PegCole17 who retains all rights to publication. If you are reading this on any site other than HubPages then this material has been copied without my permission and is a violation of copyright law. I would appreciate if you would contact me at pegcole17.hubpages.com to report any misuse.
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- The Dean of Gratitude
When my small business in Florida failed and I closed the doors, I took a job as an administrative assistant at USF. It was a tough time for me economically and emotionally but I learned something that would carry me forward with a new attitude.
From Other Hubbers
- RIP JIM ROHN
America's Foremost Business Philosopher, Mr. Jim Rohn
- Website for Jim Rohn, America's Foremost Business Philosopher
"Jim Rohn is outstanding! He is among the most polished, professional speakers in America, with a message everyone should hear." Brian Tracy
1 Ed Foreman, How to Have a Goood Day Everyday
2Mark Victor Hansen Dare to Win
3 Earl Nightingale, The Strangest Secret
4 Bernie Siegel, M.D., Discovering Your Human Potential
5 Jim Rohn, How to Have Your Best Year Ever
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How true. It's one of the few things we can truly control, our own mind. When we start to doubt and become cynical the doors to happiness close. You might guess I'm working on my self as I say this. I needed a good kick in the pants to get going today. Thanks for taking time to comment.
Yes, we can choose our own attitude! It was when I was driving long hours on highways through curving/rolling Tennesse behind slow moving vehicles that I learned to love classical music and the peace it brought me.
How strange that we didn't meet at a rest stop along the way. I spent many long hours on the KY-TN highway too! I would fly into Lexington, drive to Chattanooga then drive to Nashville for weekly bi-meetings. We saw much of the same beautiful scenery! Learning to sit back and relax is an acquired process. Guess that's part of the aging thing too. Patience.
More than once I sat in a traffic jam due to a terrible accident where it took hours to clear the road. Missed flights, meetings, etc.. Still came out ahead of whoever was in the accident.
Thanks for commenting on these thoughts.
Great advice. Life is so much nicer when we decide to just go with the flow.
Catherine, yes, going with the flow becomes easier when we reach a certain age where, hopefully, patience kicks in. We noticed this when we moved out to the country. People regard each other differently here, they wave to their neighbors and drive slower out of consideration to each other. What a pleasure that is, to enjoy rather than be aggravated. Thanks for your comment!
It's amazing how our perceptions change as we get older. Whenever someone asks me how am I doing, I always say greaaat. I read somewhere that if you say that, your release endorphins that actually make you feel that way, and it works. So no matter what is going on in my life that's the way I respond and that's the way that I feel. Very good hub.
fastfreta,
How true and so uplifting to hear. So is being around someone who's in a good mood. Thanks for mentioning the endorphins for a natural lift. Also for stopping in to comment. I like positive people who treat each day as a gift.
Excellent hub, brillant writing and very informative. I am a positive person by nature amd you have a gift of writing, keep up the good work with these lovely hubs.
Thank you Rebecca E. That is high praise coming from someone with your obvious talent! Much appreciated and encouraging. pc17
Very profound and well written hub! And, once we get this, we have to keep reminding ourselves of it over and over!
I am taking fastfreta's advice and saying, "I'm doing great" all the time - love it! lol!
Thank you kartika damon. You're absolutely right. I have to work on myself every day, all day. It's so easy to fall into non productive thought patterns. One of my mentors says to work harder on yourself than you do on your job. fastfreta has the secret though. I'm terrific too. lol!
What an inspiring way to look at things. And how self-centered we can become -- why is that driver in MY way, as though it is done deliberately. Yes, why not look at that commute time as a gift -- a time to enjoy, to think, to pass pleasantly. Thank you for showing us another way.
lmmartin, That's a good way to think of commute time: as a gift. Thanks for that insight. It does present a chunk of time where we're often alone and we can learn or ponder. Lots of time.
This is so fantastic, wow, wow, wow. I have to turn out onto one of the most dangerous crossing I have ever seen in the country. Every morning, even though the road is clear someone will inevitably come outta no where doing 70 in a fifty, even though they see me they insist for some reason on screeching up and honking for a prolonged period of time. Now, this is such hostile behavior. I don't ever get it. If I wasn't the suspecting driver that I am, if I was the elderly lady, it might not work out so well. Then they insist on getting the first opening and tearing around me. Mind you by this time I am up to speed. As they go around me I get to start my day with some very colorful comments, gestures and etc. Now, as they tear around me, roll their window down and yes, slow down to look at me and yell guess what happens. Yes, you guessed it, they have slowed someone behind them down, so now they have someone honking and yelling at them. I just naturally just smile and wave. Now, I only travel 1.5 miles before I turn off of this temper inducing road. But, I can say I witness this go on about 5 times in that short distance. Thanks for your uplifing take on a different attitude. I do hope some of the people who travel through Washoe Valley, NV read your hub. TY,TY!!!!!
Hello Crickette_w, I love the way you described your commute. The hostility is inexcusable! Where is the love? Aren't these folks our "neighbors" even as fellow commuters?
I heard a story at a seminar about the job applicant who was circling the multi-level parking garage, seeking a spot to park so he could make it to his interview on time. He drives round and round, tires squealing on the cement when he finally spots a place. From the opposite direction a car is approaching. The guy gasses the car and slides into the vacant spot ahead of the other driver and flips him off for good measure. Arriving just in the nick of time for his appointment, he enters the office suite only to meet his parking lot adversary who, you guessed it, happens to be the hiring manager he is supposed to meet.
Thanks for your great comments and descriptive tale. I wish you the best of luck on that dangerous stretch of road.
You're so very right. It's good to be able to put yourself in someone else's shoes and understand that they must be going through something bad to snap.
I once had a customer rip me to shreds on the phone, and make me feel so small, but I could tell she was elderly, upset and after she put the phone down, I realised she must have been in pain.
I was right, that poor lady was just so fed up with her world, that she just had to let it loose, and it just happened to be me. When she came in the showroom one day, we discovered we both loved dogs, and from then on we always talked about them and it cheered her up.
It is hard sometimes to look on the bright side of things especially when they keep going wrong, but I always find that humour gets us through. We always try to see a funny side to things and that helps.
Thanks for the lovely comments you wrote on my page.
Pastella 13, You have such a kind understanding of the human side of things. Thank you so much for sharing the story about your experience and how you managed to turn a situation around through empathy. I'm so blessed to have met you here on HubPages. Your comments are much appreciated.
I so agree - attitude, attitude, attitude. I too am at that stage in my life where I appreciate the value of time so much more. I am trying to be grateful for the special little moments that tend go unnoticed throughout the day. It looks like you have had many nice clear sunny days while driving. Good hub with good attitude.
uliveulearn, It does boil down to attitude. And with maturity we begin to appreciate the small moments rather than waste them. Every day the sun comes up for us is a blessing, whether it shines or not. You live, you learn, thank you.
PegCole Fantastic Hub sister. This is a great reminder of what I aspire to be each day. You are so right our thoughts and attitude can make or break our day and situation. Keep looking up. After every storm is a calm. I keep my eyes on the creator. He is light and love. Wonderful writing.
I like to ask in the morning. 'What can I give today'? For me that works. Nothing takes me from self, worries and cares more then helping someone else. It is a choice.
skye2day - - What a great way to start the day! I love it. Our lives in service. How beautiful. Thanks for sharing your technique for daily inspiration. Yes, taking us away from self, worries and cares.
I've recently spent some time visiting at a Skilled Nursing Facility where a family member is recovering. One visit there and most folks will walk away feeling grateful and blessed on their own behalf. It is a reality check.
"Your Perception is Your Reality" was a truly excellent choice for the title. I also happen to 100 percent agree with it. This is the kind of hub that helps people.
paradigmsearch, Hi. So nice to have you comment on this article. Thank you for the positive words. Glad to hear this is how you feel too.
I heard Mark V. Hansen say this (the title) at a seminar in 1995, and once it sank in I realized how true it is. We all see things from our own point of view, whether that's good or not so good. We make our own happiness or not. Thanks again for stopping by.
This was a great hub. I enjoyed reading it. It will make me think before I react the next time.
Mrs. J.B., I still have my moments where I backslide but I'm working on myself everyday. Thanks for your nice comments.
A very positive note and a very informative hub. Thanks. Awesome!
Thank you celeBritys4africA! Nice of you to stop in.
You are so right! It really is all about one's attitude. I love the quote "Attitude - not aptitude - determines your altitude." Unknown. I really enjoyed this hub! And I like your attitude. take care! :-)
Jo_Goldsmith, Thanks- you too! And I like that quote too. Was it Zig Ziglar? One of the reasons I followed you was your profile and philosophy about life. Thanks for dropping in here to read and comment.
Two words " Profoundly Intelligent " and the usage of that Yogism was an added plus!
Thank you Frank. Nice of you to leave such a thoughtful comment. I love Yogi quotes!
The very first line was true, it is not what happens it is a matter of solution on how can we handle it.
Hello naturalsolutions
Absolutely! How we handle things is a key indicator of what kind of person we are. Thanks for your nice comment.
Every little thing that we do I mean we act reflects what kind of person we are. And even handling a small problem could test your personality. Just think of the solution and the problem.
Albus Dumbledore said "It is not our abilities that show us what we are, it is our choices."
Thanks, Naturalsolutions, for dropping by to comment.
I like this article and will be including it in my Squidoo lens Attitude, Perceptions and Understanding Yourself.
Well done
Thank you Moonfish and I appreciate the backlinks.
I really enjoyed reading your Hub.
Thank you Pro. I heard this at a seminar years ago and it stuck with me. Sort of like that Abe Lincoln quote, "“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Smiles your way.
cygnetbrown Level 1 Commenter 2 years ago
I've always been a glass-half full kind of gal. I always try to remember, circumstances won't change until we change.